The Helgalian Chronicles comprise transcendental correspondence between myself and 'Helga', a Canadian scholar who loves the United States wholeheartedly and is exceedingly fond of American Civil War history, and her dear friend, 'Richard', an Oxford educated FBI consultant, now deceased, both of whom allowed me to publish our exchanges on condition that I not name them because they believed I was quite mad after I confessed to my brief stay in the Upstate Asylum where I received injections and shocks, and several messages from Madame Blavatsky, Richard Price, Ella Wheeler Wilcox, the Cistercians, and the like. I believe the reader, after reading this little book and dozens of others that I have penned, will agree that I am as sane as can be, and for that reason I should be institutionalized.