Welcome to my self-help book for humans! I am Cthulhu, the Great Old One, and I am here to share with you my life advice. From how to take care of your mental and physical health to how to face death, there is no topic that I cannot approach with my unique and macabre perspective.

Are you tired of typical self-help books that are boring and full of clichés? Then you've come to the right place. In this book, you will find my wise words mixed with a touch of black humor and a pinch of irreverence.

But why should you listen to me, a supernatural being who only hopes to devour you at some point? Because, dear humans, no one knows life and death better than I do. And believe me, there's nothing like the perspective of an endless existence to make you appreciate every moment of your mortal life.

So if you want to learn how to live fully (or at least try before being devoured by me), look no further than this book. Discover my secrets for a long, healthy, and fear-filled life!

And if, after reading my advice, you still can't avoid being consumed by me, at least you'll have the satisfaction of having tried!