It might be an illusion, but I'm very happy with him and this life. Everything I said about him, I could go on and on about how wonderful he is. He can seem quite cynical, yet most of that was due to years of disappointing experiences. He's not socially oriented, but neither am I. In so many ways, we're compatible. The only problem is our difference in ages. But I would rather live a few short years with him, than to have never known his love.