Emotional regulation is a characteristic absent in a borderline's cognitive operation. Stability isn't a known function or concept. Explosive, reactive, impulsive, depressive, insecurity masked as narcissism, comes in waves crashing every few seconds. The outside world seemingly astonished by the sheer self-destructive derangement. Manifested as a result of abandonment, times described as traumatic and overwhelming dramaticism. Living like this is painful, constantly dishevelled by the consequences of our own actions, that would not have been committed, if our brain knew how to regulate emotions. It's just a constant cycle of anxiety ridden compulsion and suicidal ideation. Battling the fact of knowing that healing is an almost impossible conclusion.