Come as You Are

ebook Meditation & Grief

By G. Scott Graham

cover image of Come as You Are

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Grief is not something to "get over." It's not a process with a neat ending. It's not a checklist to complete. Grief is a relentless storm, a weight that never fully lifts, a journey that reshapes who we are. But what if, instead of resisting it, we embraced grief as a gift?
On December 11, 2019, G. Scott Graham began another 10-day Vipassanā meditation course—something he had done regularly since first discovering the practice in 1996. In the early hours of Sunday, December 22, 2019, as Scott's course ended, his husband of 31 years, Brian Stephens, burned to death in a horrific automobile accident. Just two months later, the world shut down due to COVID-19, leaving Scott to navigate unimaginable loss in complete isolation.
In Come as You Are: Meditation & Grief, Scott shares the raw, unfiltered reality of grieving while offering practical tools for those walking a similar path. More than an inspirational memoir, this book provides pragmatic guidance for anyone experiencing loss, those supporting the grieving, and professionals working with bereavement.
Inside, you'll find:

  • Blunt, Real Talk About Grief – Forget the five stages. Scott dismantles grief myths and exposes the isolating reality of loss.
  • Meditation as a Lifeline – Discover how ānāpāna-sati, vipassanā-bhāvanā, and mettā-bhāvanā became Scott's most important allies in surviving grief.
  • A Personal, Relatable Story – Scott's deeply personal reflections, unedited journal entries, and experiences of loss help you feel less alone.
  • Guidance for Those Supporting the Grieving – If you've ever struggled with what to say or do for someone in pain, this book will change how you show up for them.
  • Techniques, Strategies & Resources – Practical tools to help integrate grief and carry it forward rather than "move on."
    This book isn't just about loss—it's about what comes after. When the initial support fades, when well-meaning words no longer land, when you are left to face grief alone—what then?
    With honesty, wit, and hard-earned wisdom, Come as You Are: Meditation & Grief will challenge you, comfort you, and—most of all—give you permission to grieve in your own way.
    Buy now and start embracing grief as part of your healing.

    May all beings be happy. May all beings live with ease. May all beings be at peace.

  • Come as You Are