Dear Reader,

What do you get when you combine a greedy Great Tsar, his two cheating, bullying older sons, his youngest esser (shh! no saying that aloud) son, stolen gold apples, a Firebird quest, A. Wolfe who has the power t'assume a pleasing shape, a magickal sandstorm, as well as two bands and a full Symphony of Gipsumies?

A rollicking, roisterous Russian Fairy Tale, with vigorous esser activities in tents, halls, bedrooms and alcoves, with and without the assistance of PSTs. Plus princely parades, a duel over Gus, new lyrics to an old drinking song, and the possibility of bits of blood, gobs of gore or moments of mayhem. As required by CORA (the Code of RFT Authors), should these occur, your author will give you timely warning.

Ah. Still not ready to part with your kopek-equivalent? Consider the fun you'll have reading chapters like:

"To Kvetch, Or Not To Kvetch? A Reader's Choice"

"Ivan Has A Close Encounter Of The F-Word Kind"

"Second Direction Questers vs. The Caliph's Sayer Of Sooths"

"Will Sasha Succeed In Seducing Prince Ivan?"

"Bad Prince Ivan! No Touch Cage!"

"A Travel Pause For Gratuitous Sex In The Tent—Which Does Not Advance The Plot—At The Insistence Of The Characters"

"A Necessary Interlude To Consider The Age-Old Questing Question: What The [Expletive Of Your Choice, Dear Reader] Do We Do Next?"

If you buy it and try it, you'll like it, or so says your most talen...er...humble author.

p.s. If Karrie Jax and I have covered you and blurbed you to buy, look for "Dear Reader, Along The Way, Did You Happen To See The Allusion To Olivier?" in the TOC. It's a spot-the-allusions chance at gift cards of $25, $15, or $10.

179,768 words of fun and frolic in this true tale, plus a 2162-word teaser from another MM fairytale: The Tinderbox