The moan heard round the world—that's what they're calling me. I'm the toughest Press Secretary there ever was and now a sex tape I didn't even know I had made is circling the internet. Everyday I face a room full of the Associate Press and they ask me to name the man in the video but I won't. That's not how I play. But will he rescue me from a political nightmare when I need him?

Sometimes a knight doesn't show up in shining armor, he's videotaped wearing nothing at all...