I had to get closer to Ryder, my body felt magnetically drawn to him, but with each step I fought the initial pull. I couldn't trust my impulses; they were telling me to give myself to him, and I didn't even know him.

When Zack kissed me, later that night, I pulled away breathless, hypnotized, and unsteady. The months following were a whirlwind of desire and reckless choices I'd never in my life thought I'd take.