Nicky is not quite a typical teenager.

Ignored by his single parent mother, he just manages to cope with his life. But something is missing and he looks for it in almost every man he sees.

Suddenly one of his fantasies comes true and his life changes - for ever, but in the process, he discovers there is more to both life and death than he had ever thought possible.

He finds someone who will discipline and control him in the strict way of the times, all of which contributes to moulding his character, and the reader journeys through his life, as Nicky learns to come to terms with himself, his own faults, and the major effect his first love has had on both him and others.