This book is a memoir about how the conscious and unconscious roles manic depression and creativity have shaped my life. I was fifty-eight years old when I discovered that for most of my adult life, I had been manic depressive (Bi-Polar II). Twenty years ago, as I sorted through the ashes of my erratic life journey, two facts became clear: manic depression had charted the course of my life, and creativity had been my constant savior. I wrote this book with the hope that some of my words might help other manic depressives better understand the machinations of their disease and the topography of their wilderness. It might also help them use their creativity to find balance and stability. This book is tough sledding; it throws punches from the first to last.