Leading lady and one-time telly star Eleanor Woodwarde's life is collapsing around her exquisitely turned ankles. As an alternative to suicide, she takes the lead in an overblown West End salsa musical. The producer's volatile incompetence is matched only by the length of his cigar. A rival actress is after the number one dressing room. And the director can't keep his hands to himself. Eleanor fears for her sanity, but at fifty quid a skull the show must go on...

"If you want to know showbiz, read this and weep with laughter" - Joanna Lumley