A Queer Manifesto, a Comedy, a Dating & Healing Journey after a 35 Year Marriage

When nonbinary Orpheus leaves their much-loved asexual partner Tobi after 35 years, they have never dated sober, never had a casual girlfriend and never had sober sex. At the age of sixty-two, they've been living out and proud not only as nonbinary, but also as plural (multiple personalities), filming a queer web series, when they realize their partner's asexuality is never going to change.

So they start to date.

They're completely unprepared for middle-aged lesbians and their complicated desires. Romance, flirting, love-bombing, control, seduction and desire roll into Orpheus' life and wake up every possible opinion among their many vocal, funny and vulnerable personalities.

The book follows Kaye, depicted through the protagonist Orpheus, as they naively step into the challenges of contemporary online dating later in life. Orpheus experiences their inner life as made up of multiple consciousnesses, all of which are present as queer relationships unfold. The book traces attraction, desire, conflict, humor, and care as they are experienced across this plural inner world, offering a vivid and often funny portrait of queer intimacy.

At its core, Bachelorx takes an affirming stance: being gender nonconforming and multiple is not a problem to be solved. The book treats both gender and plurality as a meaningful way of being, shaped by experiences and relationships. The book offers an experience of coming to radically accept and love all of ourselves. We all matter, Orpheus says.

We do.

Take the listening journey.