Hounded by God

ebook A Gay Man's Journey to Self-Acceptance, Love, and Relationship

By Joseph Gentilini

cover image of Hounded by God

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In Hounded by God, the author writes about his struggle to integrate his homosexuality with his personality and his Catholic-Christian spirituality. Born in 1948, he grew up in the '50s, '60s, and '70s when homosexuality was considered either a mental illness or a major sin. In 1968, he had his first homosexual experience. Feeling shame and trying to repress his feelings, he spent over six years in therapy.

Raised a strict Roman Catholic, Joseph confessed his many "sins" to a priest and attended Mass daily. He felt hopeless in accepting his homosexuality and living happily as a gay man, repeating nightly, "If it gets too bad, I can always kill myself." By 1974, he knew that therapy was not changing his sexual orientation and felt desperate.

Joseph experienced God as hounding him to accept his gay identity and to believe that God loves him as he is. His autobiographical journal reveals his gradual awakening to live his vocation, not only as a gay man in relationship with his spouse and with God, but also as someone willing to share his journey with those who struggle with their homosexuality and their faith.

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Joseph Gentilini and his spouse, Leo Radel, were both born in Columbus, Ohio; Joe in 1948 and Leo in 1950. Ironically, they both attended the same Catholic elementary school, although they did not know each other then. Joseph always wanted to be in a career that involved helping others. He earned his undergraduate degree in 1970 from the Ohio Dominican College (now University) in social welfare. Beginning his career as an employee of the State of Ohio, he worked as a vocational rehabilitation counselor, helping persons with severe disabilities to become more independent with the goal of competitive employment. He obtained his Master's degree from The Ohio State University in 1974 in counseling and guidance. Joseph worked for another four years and then took an educational leave-ofabsence for two years to complete his doctoral coursework in community counseling at Ohio University in Athens, Ohio. He returned to work for the state and completed his dissertation at night, finally graduating in 1982 with his PhD. Joseph is an Ohio Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, a licensed Social Worker, and a Certified Rehabilitation Counselor. In 2003, Joseph retired from state employment and Leo from the United States Postal Service. Leo was married for twelve years and has three children, all now adults. Joseph and Leo enjoy and love them and their grandchildren. They are members of DignityUSA, an organization for gay Catholics. Joseph has been an active journal-writer since the mid-1970

Hounded by God