A radiant, exquisitely told portrait of a young woman growing up between cultures, in search of her future self
Before you are anything, you are a daughter.
At first, you are a child at home in your mother’s belly: a beloved daughter, a vision of the future. But who will you become? At the Dol ceremony on your first birthday, dressed in a bright fuchsia hanbok, your family gathers around to see which item you’ll reach for that will determine the course of your life. You choose the pencil.
As your family moves from Seoul to snowy Minnesota, you and your mother find yourselves in a new American life that you must navigate together, mastering its language and customs. Soon enough, you are in pursuit of perfection—your mother marshaling you through a childhood of achievements to shape you into the person she most wants you to be. But you are not just your mother’s daughter, despite her sacrifices. As the years go by, you want to build a life between these two cultures that feels yours—an identity that lies somewhere in between your homeland and motherland.
Told in incandescent prose, Cay Kim’s debut novel is a portrait of a brilliant young woman growing up between worlds, and a glorious love letter to girlhood, family, and the great dreams we hold for ourselves, no matter where we’re from.