They tricked me into a dark and unholy union. Three bastards in witch hats, leather pants, and iron masks. These supernatural stalkers have claimed me for their coven. They won't go away. These assholes will. not. leave. All because I fell for an urban legend: touch the Witch's Tree on a moonless night and discover magic. Wholesome magic like: kinky rituals, blood sacrifice, and jizz potions. Oh, and a forest god who eats people—while they're still alive and screaming. Send help, and I'll send cupcakes. The Witchwood Boys Are Trending is a reverse harem/why-choose romance (meaning one woman with three men). It's a unique blend of cozy urban fantasy and dark horror, and while it starts spicy, it gets much, much spicier. Includes forced proximity tropes, grumpy-sunshine dynamics, and a main character with a banana slug tattoo. All characters are twenty-two or older. Contains mature content. A complete list of content warnings can be found on the author's website. Narrated in duet style.