For nearly three decades, Ryan MacDonald wore his uniform with pride - serving on the frontlines of warzones and major crime scenes alike. But behind the uniform and beneath the armour, a silent battle raged.

Blue Lights, Dark Mind takes you deep inside the rarely spoken truth of life in uniform-where moments of calm can shatter in an instant, and the cost of service is often paid for in sleepless nights, fractured relationships, and hidden scars. From the blood-soaked streets of war to the taped-off alleys of murder investigations, this raw and unflinching memoir exposes the reality of PTSD, the weight of public duty, and the painful journey to reclaim identity after the uniform is gone.

Heart breaking, honest, and ultimately hopeful- this is not just a story about trauma. It's a story about fighting your way back