Jason and the Argonauts
ebook ∣ Golden Fleece, Broken Dreams, and a Ship Full of Regrets
By Scott Markham
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📘 Book Description
You know the story of Jason and the Argonauts... or do you?
Forget the sanitized classroom version. This is Greek mythology with the gloves off, the gods drunk, and the ship crewed by himbos with commitment issues. In Jason and the Argonauts: Golden Fleece, Broken Dreams, and a Ship Full of Regrets, the legendary quest is retold through a lens of sarcasm, satire, and divine disappointment. Watch as Jason heroically fumbles through a quest he barely understands, collects enemies faster than trophies, betrays the most terrifying sorceress in mythology (spoiler: bad move), and ultimately gets crushed by his own boat. Literally.
This isn't just a retelling—it's a post-mortem with punchlines.
Meet the Argonauts: a band of dysfunctional legends who somehow survive gods, monsters, harpies, flaming brides, and Jason's leadership style. Cheer for Medea, who sets the standard for revenge with poise, poison, and poetic timing. Marvel as the fleece becomes the least magical thing in the story. And when the gods shrug and the credits roll, you'll be begging for more epic disasters from the mythological roastmaster himself.
If you've ever wanted to laugh at legends, question heroes, and fall headfirst into tales where the metaphors have teeth—this is your book.
And if you survive the storm?
Homer Sapien has plenty more mythology where that came from.