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📘 The Underworld Custody Battle: A Love Story So Toxic, It Changed the Seasons
by Homer Sapien
Move over, Romeo and Juliet — this love story features fewer balconies and way more pomegranate seeds. In The Underworld Custody Battle, Homer Sapien spins a darkly comedic tale of obsession, overbearing moms, and a marital arrangement so contentious, it literally freezes the Earth every year.
Meet Persephone: bright, blooming, goddess-next-door.
Meet Hades: brooding bachelor of the Underworld with serious commitment issues and a suspicious interest in horticulture.
One impulsive kidnapping later, and boom — we've got ourselves a divine custody arrangement that makes family court look like a picnic.
With Demeter turning Earth into a cold wasteland every time her daughter's on her "dad week," this myth isn't just ancient — it's the origin of seasonal depression.
Why should you dive into this mythological mess?
And when you're done watching gods ruin climate patterns for love, check out more disasters from the divine pen of Homer Sapien, including:
Homer Sapien: turning myth into mayhem, one disaster at a time.
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