Gaslighting
audiobook (Unabridged) ∣ Psychological Manipulation to Make Someone Doubt Their Reality
By Cito Harder
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Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation designed to make a person question their reality, memory, and perceptions. This insidious tactic is often used to exert power and control over others, making them more vulnerable to influence. The term originates from the 1944 film Gaslight, in which a husband manipulates his wife into doubting her own sanity by subtly altering her environment and insisting that she is imagining things. Over time, the concept has evolved to describe a range of behaviors intended to destabilize and disorient a target, whether in personal relationships, workplaces, politics, or broader societal contexts.
At its core, gaslighting is not about simple lying or deception—it is about eroding a person's confidence in their ability to trust their own thoughts and feelings. Gaslighters often employ tactics such as denial, contradiction, misdirection, and trivialization to manipulate their targets. For instance, they may deny having said or done something, even when there is clear evidence to the contrary. They may dismiss a person's concerns as overreactions or exaggerations, making the victim feel unreasonable for questioning the situation. Over time, the repeated nature of these tactics causes the victim to second-guess their own reality, often leading to confusion, self-doubt, and emotional dependence on the manipulator.
Gaslighting thrives in power imbalances. It is most commonly seen in relationships where one party has an advantage over the other—whether through authority, emotional leverage, or societal position. In romantic relationships, a partner may gaslight their significant other to maintain control, dismissing valid concerns about infidelity, financial issues, or abusive behavior. In workplaces, gaslighting can manifest when a superior undermines an employee's confidence, making them doubt their competence or memory of events.