The Adventurer's Retirement Home: Swordrest & Sundries

By David Jonesy
Welcome to Swordrest. The tea is strong, the soup is suspicious, and the goat judges everyone equally.

After a lifetime of world-saving, villain-thwarting, and emotionally repressed monologuing, the heroes of old have finally hung up their swords... mostly.

Swordrest is the retirement home where washed-up warriors, magical misfits, and slightly traumatised legends go to forget the plot and focus on puzzles, stews, and trying not to explode the laundry room (again).

But when mysterious happenings begin to stir in the town of Greyhaven, missing memories, impossible theatre troupes, a mildly prophetic goat named Prophet, the residents of Swordrest must face the one enemy they never trained for: retirement with unresolved baggage.

Led by a gloriously dysfunctional cast:

Together, they'll face eldritch audits, cursed storytelling contests, suspicious furniture, and at least one door that absolutely should not be opened, but probably will be.

A warm, witty fantasy about aging disgracefully, found family, and the stories we're still telling, even when the world thinks we're done.

Perfect for fans of Terry Pratchett, Travis Baldree, and anyone who's ever wished their retirement came with more soup and fewer world-ending prophecies.