The Reward of Not Knowing

ebook A Hero's Inward Journey

By Alexander Demetrius

cover image of The Reward of Not Knowing

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In my memoir The Reward of Not Knowing, I take readers on a journey, marked by both adventure and introspection, from Texas to Los Angeles, Hawaii to California wine country, and from Ireland's wild cliffs to the mountains of Austria. I detail my transformation from being a people-pleaser stuck in a state of alienation to being empowered to follow my bliss. I posit that, in order to bridge our societal divides, we must foster a deeper sense of self-awareness and connection. I encourage readers to come to terms with their sense of purpose by following their intuition, exploring new relationships, and pursuing varied interests. Within this, I demonstrate how developing a spiritual center is fundamental to stability and courage, enabling one to pursue interests no matter the time it takes.


The Reward of Not Knowing weaves personal anecdotes with practical insights, providing readers with concrete strategies for transforming their lives. Inspired by Joseph Campbell's hero's journey, I trace my evolution of personal growth through a myriad of jobs and living situations, including a stint living in my car and pursuing a fledgeling career as a Hollywood actor, a short period spent in a psychiatric hospital and a year traveling across Europe. As the story progresses, I self-heal the traumas of my childhood, follow the advice of many wise mentors, push myself to the limits under the tutelage of challenging bosses, and undergo a spiritual awakening that connects me ever more deeply to the creative path. The concept of "follow your bliss," which was Joseph Campbell's refrain to his students, is central to the book's ethos: I present it as a means to stay in touch with one's inner source of creativity and inspiration.

The Reward of Not Knowing