Once upon the early 2000s...

Trixie Taylor is asexual—she just doesn't know that's an option. So imagine her consternation, when the deadline for the virginity pact she made in eighth grade is now upon her. It's her last high school party, and the entire graduating class has heard that Trixie's ready to swipe her V-card tonight.

So. No time to panic.

Ready or not, she's got someone in mind to help her...

Riot Shane is every bit the loser virgin his friends roast him for being, and way more than his rebel reputation suggests (things would be different if he'd get his GED and a haircut, but oh well). When incurable crush Trixie Taylor asks for his help, Riot finds himself playing fake boyfriend, real bodyguard, and the house party's errand boy.

Welp. At least responsibility's never looked as good as it does with his dream girl in the passenger seat.

Ready or not, the night's only just begun...