The Dynamics of Powerful Parenting is a book about power, the

power held by a parent to shape the development of a child, and the

power of a child to either accept or reject those efforts.

Often, when things are not working well for parents with their

children, they will continue doing the same things, yet with ever more

vigor. Usually, the result will be more of the same, only worse. A

secret to understanding the dynamics of many human behaviors lies in the

paradox of the Chinese Finger Puzzle (aka: Chinese Handcuff). The

Chinese finger puzzle is a tube woven from bamboo shoots that is several

inches long and about the diameter of a person's fingers; true to its

nature, the tube will narrow as its ends are pulled. Thus, when the tube

is slipped over the ends of fingers or thumbs on opposing hands, the

subject's efforts to pull his or her fingers apart are met with

increasing resistance from the device.

So it is with much of being human. The thing that people wish to

avoid most is the very thing that results from their efforts to do so.

Dynamics is a book written with this paradox in mind. It is a

book of insights about parenting that turns upside down many of the

things that are currently held dear in "traditional" parenting efforts.

It is a book that downplays the use of punishment, but never overlooks

the need for discipline and responsibility. Dynamics encourages parents

to think about what they are doing, how they are doing it, and what are

they are experiencing as a result, then provides useful tools for

changing undesired outcomes. It is a book that can produce positive

results that will benefit generations yet unborn.